Top Ten Reasons Babies are better than iPads

The ChallengerTop Ten Reasons Babies are better than the iPad

  1. Babies eventually grow up to be better than their fathers.
  2. Babies get cuter as they get older.  Think those fingerprints on your screen will get any cuter?
  3. Babies don’t have a daily purchase limit.
  4. After you get a baby, most people are satisfied for awhile and don’t want to upgrade for a long time.
  5. Babies make other people smile when they see them.  iPads just make people ask, “What’s that?”
  6. iPads look dorky in strollers.
  7. Putting an iPad on your back makes you look like a Borg.
  8. Babies don’t care if you use Flash, Objective-C, or Lua.  Babies just want you to talk to them in any language.
  9. Babies don’t require you to dress in black turtlenecks, khakis, or attend MacWorld for any reason.
  10. Babies are a LOT more fun to make than standing in line to buy an iPad

AND!

Top Ten Reasons iPads are better than BabiesThe Champion!

  1. iPads never require college educations.  The closest you get is $4.99 for the Encyclopedia app.
  2. You can shut the iPad off at 10pm and turn it back on at 7am every day, without social services knocking at your door.
  3. When the iPad is hungry, you can plug it in and leave it alone for two hours.
  4. One word:  Diapers.
  5. The iPad will never go on a first date or drive your car.  Ever.  Not even with iPhoneOS 4.0.
  6. You’ll never hear the iPad asking where it came from.
  7. The iPad will never walk in on you having sex.
  8. Trying to swipe a baby will land you in jail.
  9. Best game with a baby:  Peek-a-boo.  Which gets boring pretty fast.  Solitaire, on the other hand…
  10. You can’t make menstruation jokes about babies.

Top Three Motivators For Developers (Hint: not money!)

Software has long since lost its glory-days status.  We’re not the go-to field anymore.  Geeks are no longer revered as gods amongst humanity for our ability to manipulate computers.  We get crappy jobs just like everyone else.

So, what is it that still motivates you to work as a software developer?

Ah...satisfaction!

Is it your fat salary, great perks, and end-of-year bonuses?  Unless you’ve been working on Mars for the past two years, I think Computerworld would disagree with you.  We’ve been getting kicked in the nads just as hard as everyone else.  Between budget cutbacks, layoffs and reductions in benefits or increases in hours, clearly our paychecks are not our primary source of satisfaction.

If money was our primary motive, right now we’d be seeing a mass exodus from the tech sector.  So, if it’s not the money, then what is it that we hang on to when we get up each day?  Are we really working for those options?  That salary bonus?

Turns out, we’re kidding ourselves if we think that’s our real motive as developers.

The assumption: People perform better when given a tangible, and even substantial, reward for completing a task.  Think bonuses, stock options, and huge booze-driven parties.

The reality: In a narrow band of actual cases, this is true.  (And by narrow, I mean anything that isn’t a cognitive task, simple or complex, according to the research I quote below).  By and large, the reward-based incentive actually creates poorer performance in any group of workers for cognitive tasks, regardless of economic background or complexity of the task involved.  (Sorry, outsourcers…dangling the reward under your workers noses doesn’t help even when your home country is considerably poorer on average than Western economies.  Yet another surprising finding of their research.)

I’m not making this up, nor am I just drawing on anecdotal experience.  Watch this 18 minute video from TED and I’ll bet you’re convinced too:

Daniel Pink gave this lecture at the 2009 TED.  It’s mind-blowing if you’re stuck in the carrot-and-stick mentalityAnd I’ll just bet, unless you work for Google, are self-employed, or extremely worldly, you probably are.

I’m not saying that to be mean or controversial.  I’m saying that because this mentality has pervasively spread to every business, industry and country on the planet over the past 100 years.  It’s not just software development, but we’re hardly immune from its effect.

While we’re not immune to the impact, we do have a lot going for us that gives us an advantage in stepping outside this mentality:

  • Developers tend to be social oddballs and the normal conventions seem awkward to us. Social oddballs tend to question things.  We don’t like what everyone else likes because, well, we’re nerds and we don’t think like sales people.  Or accountants.  Or athletes.  We’re willing to try things others find weird because we’re weird too.
  • Because we’re odd, we tend to be forward thinking and revolutionary in our approaches to workplace advancements. Think about the good aspects of the Dot Com era:  pets in the workplace, recreation rooms with pool tables and ping pong, better chairs and desks for people, free lunches.  Those innovations didn’t come out of Pepsi, Toyota, or Price Waterhouse Coopers, they came out of tech companies.  Every one.
  • In doing so, our weird becomes the new normal. Witness the output of the Dot Com era:  Aside from the economic meltdown, how many companies now regularly practice some, if not all of those things we did back in the late 90s?  (Albeit with more restraint, thankfully)

With that in mind, let’s take Daniel’s idea of the results-oriented work environment (ROWE) forward and create something new for the 21st century.  It focuses on three important ideas, which developers already love and embrace:

  1. Autonomy
  2. Mastery
  3. Purpose

Autonomy: What developer out there doesn’t like to be given the freedom to do their own thing, on their terms, with their preferred hours, using their tools, environment, IDE, language, operating system and favorite t-shirt?  Find me a single developer anywhere that doesn’t crave this kind of freedom and I’ll pay you $10.  Seriously.  Drop me a contact above.  I’m good for it.  Of course, you’ll search for the rest of your life and won’t be able to do it.

Mastery: Every developer on the planet wants to get better at what they do.  We crave new knowledge like some people quaff coffee after a hangover.  Fortunately, the side effects of getting better at development are far more benign than caffeine binging.

Purpose: Nothing is more tedious, horrific, or uninspiring to developers to work on projects that lack any real meaning in the world.  Or lack any real direction.  Or lack any substantial need from the company.  In fact, you can probably point to the brightest points of your career all stemming from those projects that had the deepest meaning to you personally.  Maybe the darkest points are those soul-sucking projects that you waded through because you were glad to have a job but desperately waited for things to improve so you could find a better job elsewhere.  Preferably where soul-vacuums didn’t exist.

Google gets it:  They already advocate the 20% time concept and (near-)complete workplace freedom.  Atlassian gets it:  They have the Fedex challenge where everyone in the company gets 24 hours to work on something they are interested in, with the caveat you have to deliver it at the end of 24 hours and you must present it to the company.  Think those don’t create passion for the company?  How about the Nine Things Developers Want More than Money?  These points all touch on the same three basic concepts:  autonomy, mastery, and purpose.

Does your company “get it”?  If the answer is NO,  what can you do right now to change your workplace to “get it”? And if that is too Sisyphean a task for you, how about starting your own company instead, that does “get it”?

That’s my challenge for you in 2010.  “Make software suck less in the 21st century”

Good luck.

Stop Breaking These Laws (of Software)

I’ve mentioned a number of software laws in various posts, like Cargill’s Ninety Nine Rule, or Occam’s Razor.  And there are tons of laws that you probably already know, like Metcalfe’s Law or Moore’s Law.

I’ve found a very complete list of the laws regarding software development (I highly recommend reading that link. I’ll wait, go ahead).  But from that list, we seem to have developed a complete blind spot for five in particular.  Let’s look at these five and how our collective ignorance of them continues to impact software development today:

Law #1: Amdahl’s Law

Gene Amdahl first published this notion in a 1967 paper.  This law is about the mistaken notion that “All We Need Are More Parallel Processors and Our Software Will Run Faster”.

The Damning Evidence: Pop quiz:  have you bought a new machine in the past 4 years that was multi-core?  Were you a little disappointed when you checked the processor usage and found that not every one of those shiny, new cores was busy all the time, no matter which of your apps you ran?

We buy new hardware with the mistaken impression that our old programs will continue to run even faster than before because we expect our software to take advantage of all those friggin coresBut software never runs as fast we expect it to on the multi-core hardware, because the parallel component of the program is often missing, underdeveloped, or poorly understood by the developer. Thus, our software continues to disappoint us on even on shiny, new multi-core hardware.

Exceptions: Some applications have been expressly written to be massively parallel and they continue to kick ass and take names on new multi-core hardware (e.g. rendering, scientific and encoding applications).  By and large, most applications simply don’t benefit from those extra cores because they weren’t written to do so.

Law #2:  The Law of False Alerts

First introduced by George Spafford in this article, the law states that the more the user is presented with false or erroneous alerts, the more they will ignore real alerts in the system.

The Damning Evidence: Windows Vista is the classic current example.  Every bloody operation in it required your permission from the user authentication module.  After while, you just madly clicked “Yeah, sure whatever…” for every warning that popped up.  This, of course, robs the operating system of any ability to protect you from a real threat because you’ve been annoyed by the feature in the first place.

Of course, people still design applications like this:

  • “Are you sure you want to delete?”
  • “No, really, are you REALLY sure you want to delete?”.
  • “OK, look, I’ve asked already but just so I can’t be blamed for anything, are you SUPER-DUPER-ABSOLUTELY, 110% sure you want to delete?”

Stop the insanity.  If they click delete and they weren’t supposed to, how about offering an undo operation?  Too hard you say?  Then you’re not trying hard enough.  Don’t punish the users for bad design.

Law #3:  Jakob’s Law of Internet Experience

From Jakob Nielsen, web usability guru, who states that users only spend a small fraction of time on your site, compared to all other sites.  Therefore, your site experience should be similar to all other sites to minimize learning curve and maximize usability.

The Damning Evidence: Well, things like Firefox Personas aside, which distract your users from the actual content of the sites, we still can’t seem to come up with a consistent way to develop user interfaces on sites.  Thanks to Web 2.0, everyone is now trying to copy the success of sites like Facebook, Twitter, and other social networks to create wild, experimental web pages that are just plain awful to use.

Don’t get me wrong here:  I’m not saying different is bad, I’m saying that different is hard to get right.  Users (especially “Normals”) don’t like to be made to think how to use things.  But that doesn’t seem to stop us creating web pages with crazy stuff on them.

Exceptions: Sometimes, user interfaces are giant evolutionary steps that simply lie outside the normal boundaries we’ve come to expect and that’s acceptable.  The iPhone was a perfect example:  no one really had mastered the touch interface until Cupertino & Co came out with it and they didn’t exactly follow any of the old school rules.  But it was still a major success and now sets the standard for all smartphonesHowever, most everyone else thinks they’re creating the exception when they’re just breaking the rules poorly.

Law #4:  The Pesticide Paradox

Attributed to Bruce Beiser, the law states that every method you use to prevent or find bugs leaves a residue of subtler bugs against which those methods are ineffectual.

The Damning Evidence: Things like Test Driven Development and Unit Testing give us the false impression that we’ve quashed the major bugs in the system when all we’ve really done is quash the obvious bugs, leaving the more subtle, painful, and difficult ones behind.  Many of these types of bugs are related to concurrency or particular complex data conditions that are difficult to express as unit tests.

Before anyone rants about this comment section claiming I think TDD is bad, or unit testing is evil, please hear me correctly:  Unit testing and TDD leave a false sense of security that we’ve managed to create stable software. They are a starting point to more complete testing, but they are not the end.  The meaningful problems are often in integration with other systems and modules, that are often left out of testing plans because of time constraints, schedule pressures, laziness and sometimes plain arrogance.

Exceptions: Small, simpler systems rarely suffer from these issues because testing is much easier.  This is mostly a complex software problem, at a level of enterprise development, large applications (e.g. Microsoft Word), or operating systems.

Law #5:  Fisher’s Fundamental Theorem of Natural Selection

While this law stems from genetic research by R.A. Fisher, the application in software is somewhat obvious:  The more highly adapted an organism becomes, the less adaptable it is to any new change.

The Damning Evidence: We strive to create complex, interesting, and highly useful frameworks:  Hibernate, Struts, Flex, ExtJS, and jQuery to name a few.  But every version we release generates new requests by the users for missing features or enhancements.  Each change adds more complexity.  And the more complex the software, the lower the chance those changes can be easily accommodated in subsequent versions.

For example, Struts went through a major rewrite for version 2.0, which speaks volumes about the original version’s adaptability to change.  Spring did a major update for AOP that was a breaking change from 1.0.  ExtJS did the same for their 1.0 and 2.0 releases.

Exceptions:  Probably none–this seems to be the inherent nature of frameworks.  But if you know of something, please prove me wrong in the comment section.  I’d love to hear about some piece of software that didn’t follow this rule.